The Sims 4: Guide to Raising Kids


Melizza Jane Tacang

Writer and Storywriter

Melizza is a part-time writer for PlayerAssist and a full-time mom. When she's not fussing over her kids, she writes game guides on cozy simulation games like Stardew Valley and The Sims 4. She's mostly seen playing cute indie games on her laptop and Nintendo Switch. Melizza also likes revisiting her childhood survival horror games and classic RPGs because she's a sucker for nostalgia. Aside from video games, Melizza is also into anime, philosophy, true crime, and Pedro Pascal.


Raising kids in The Sims 4 can be an uphill climb, but it can also be rewarding as some Sims aspire to create a loving home. The challenge in controlling young Sims is finding balance in life and school. You can make successful adult Sims with good habits and great character traits if it’s done right.

The Sims 4: Guide to Raising Kids

In this guide, we will learn all the best parenting techniques to provide your young Sims with the proper upbringing.

Create Your Perfect Sim

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Aspirations and traits are the two key factors of their growth as they can give children an advantage when building skills. Having life Aspirations gives your Sims special perks and pushes them to become goal-oriented.

When creating children in CAS, you may settle on a trait that will benefit them later. 

You may also base the trait on the kind of aspiration you choose for them. Below you’ll find all five child aspirations and the suggested traits that could be paired with them.

Artistic Prodigy

Sims with the Artistic Prodigy aspiration get tasks focusing on art, crafts, and music. After completing the aspiration, Sims get rewarded with the Creatively Gifted trait, a permanent reward trait that takes effect when they become adults. Creatively gifted Sims can level up their writing, piano, violin, guitar, painting, and cooking skills faster.

Suggested traits: Art Lover, Perfectionist, Music Lover, and Ambitious.

Whiz Kid

These Sims get their goals fulfilled through the use of their mental skills. When the aspiration is completed, whiz kids acquire the Mentally Gifted trait, which gives Sims the advantage of leveling up their programming, logic, video gaming, rocket science, and fishing skills faster.

Suggested traits: Geek, Bookworm, Insider, Genius, and Ambitious.

Rambunctious Scamp

Rambunctious children get satisfaction points for being athletic and doing physical activities. They get rewarded with the Physically Gifted trait that boosts their fitness skills gains when they age up.

Suggested traits: Active, Adventurous, Neat, Loves the Outdoors, and Children of the Sea.

Social Butterfly

These highly-social Sims get points for making friends and becoming popular. After completing the Social Butterfly aspiration, they obtain the Socially Gifted trait, which helps them gain skills like charisma, comedy, and mischief faster.

Suggested traits: Self-Assured, Cheerful, Good, Outgoing, Animal Enthusiast, Cat Lover, and Dog Lover.

Multi-Skill (Growing Together Expansion Pack)

These young Sims aspire to master multiple skills at once. Kids who can finish this aspiration will be rewarded with a trait depending on the chosen sub-aspiration. 

If you pick Mind and Body, your Sims will get the Headstrong reward trait which delays the decay of the Confident and Focus moodlets.

Completing the Slumber Party Animal aspiration leads to obtaining the Practice Host reward trait. With this trait, they can become excellent hosts and throw great parties.

Children with the Creative Genius aspiration receive the Idea Person trait after finishing all their goals. A Sim with this trait can overcome writer’s block easier and level up creative-based skills faster.

And those who complete the Playtime Captain aspiration will acquire the Pack Animal trait.  They can have faster skill gains when learning skills with their friends.

Suggested traits: Geek, Bookworm, Insider, Genius, Ambitious, Active, Adventurous, Neat, Loves the Outdoors, Children of the Sea, Art Lover, Perfectionist, Music Lover, Self-Assured, Cheerful, Good, Outgoing, Animal Enthusiast, Cat Lover, and Dog Lover.

Develop a Healthy School-Life Balance

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Unlike infants and toddlers, children can sustain their needs on their own. They are easier to manage, but pursuing an education while filling up all their necessities can still be challenging. Here are how you can achieve optimal school-life balance for your young Sims.

Study Hard

The first step towards success in this game is to get good grades. Sims must work hard in school while in tip-top condition to improve their grades. If a student goes to school with full motives, you can set them to “Study Hard” if you click on their portraits while in class.

But first, players must satisfy Sims’ basic needs before heading to school. One helpful trick is to try filling up their motives before they go to bed on a school night.

Children go to school from 8:00 AM to 3:00 PM on weekends, except when it’s a Holiday (you’ll need the Sims 4: Seasons DLC). Failing to go to school can largely affect a student’s performance, so try to avoid skipping school as much as possible.

Stay Focused

Another great way to boost your student’s performance is to let them go to school focused. Sims can get focused by playing chess, playing video games, studying a book, inspecting focused art, being near an object with a focused emotional aura, or drinking the focused potion. 

Do Homework Regularly

Students must not forget to complete their daily homework. You can find a yellow notebook labeled “Grade School Homework” in your children’s inventory. It takes a few in-game hours for students to finish their daily homework. They can also get help from their carers to gain bonds and sentiments with them.

If your student has a grade of B or A, they can use the “Do Extra Credit” interaction after finishing their homework to raise their performance further. C Grade Students or lower can still turn the tide and “Do Makeup Work” after completing their daily tasks.

Develop Their Child Skills

Creative, Mental, Motor, and Social skills are essential to a child’s development. Improving their skills unlocks more interactions and activities. And, of course, being skilled means they can get better grades.

For example, children with maxed-out skills can breeze through their homework even without the aid of their parents or guardians.

The best way children can develop their skills is to use functional skill-building objects. You can find various items in Buy Mode to help your youngsters max out their skills faster.

Do School Projects

For players who own the Parenthood pack, Students will sometimes come home from school with an unfinished school project. They can then complete a project for a few days, and parents can help them.

Doing this can boost a student’s performance. Fortunately, it would not impact their grades to a great degree if they failed to submit their projects.

Aim to Have Positive Character Traits

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Getting straight As and maxing out their skills are not the only factors that matter to raising kids if you have the Parenthood pack. Parenting becomes essential to a child’s development due to the Parenting Skill that comes with the game pack. It provides interactions focused on molding a child’s demeanor. 

Character Values are attributes influenced by a Sim’s upbringing or parenting style. If you want to raise a perfect Sim, parents or carers should actively participate in fine-tuning a child’s moral compasses. Below are five Character Values displayed in a child’s Simology Panel, including some tips on how to raise their levels.


This character value is about being courteous and showing respect to others. You can raise a child’s manners by letting them clean the dishes, set the tables, give compliments, and be friendly to others. Carers can also teach their children to “Please and Thank You.” 

Reaching the max level of this character value in a positive approach results in Sims earning the Good Manner Trait. They get social interactions such as introducing themselves politely to strangers and offering gratitude when visiting someone in their house. They also avoid being gross, like farting or burping.


Responsibility is about taking care of obligations, such as studying. Children can be responsible by regularly doing homework, attending school, or participating in after-school activities. Children must also not forget to brush their teeth and clean up after their mess to raise their responsibility levels.

If a child maxes out this trait in a positive direction, they gain the Responsibility trait. Sims equipped with this trait can teach others to be responsible and perform well at work.

Conflict Resolution

This character value is about resolving problems constructively. If a Sim gets into a dispute with another Sim, they can apologize and reconcile. Parents can also teach their offspring to “Say Sorry.” 

Raising this character value to a max level positively will give Sims the Mediator trait. They can easily reconcile two Sims who are in a fight and apologize to those they have relationship conflicts with.


Empathy is about being emotionally aware and compassionate toward others. Young Sims can cheer up and console those who are feeling the blues. Parents can also teach their kids to be empathetic.

Empathetic Sims gain the Compassionate trait once they age up into adults. Being mean stresses them out, but they can comfort other Sims by sharing their emotional burdens.

Emotional Control

This character trait is about managing strong emotions. When children feel tense or angry, they can jog, jot down their thoughts in a journal, or calm down by listening to music.

Learning to deal with their feelings positively will reward your Sim with the Emotional Control trait. They control their emotions and use various activities to relieve their stress.

Join After-School Activities

Become A Scout

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Seasons is an expansion pack that features weather, seasons, and holidays. It also allows children and teens to do after-school activities. Sims can become scouts and be tasked to collect nine different badges. 

To get the badges, Sims must donate to charity or complete simple tasks like cleaning or repairing broken objects. Sims are not rewarded with money for their good deeds in their community. Instead, they receive trophies, an unlockable uniform, and the Scouting Aptitude reward Trait. This reward trait grants Sims the ability to level up any skill quickly.

Join The Drama Club

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Alternatively, the Get Famous pack comes with a career for young Sims who have a flair for the dramatic. Children and teens can join the drama club as an after-school activity. Since the DLC brings the Fame system to the gameplay, this career is perfect for students who dream of becoming celebrities.

Sims get sent to the rabbit hole drama club after returning home from school. Chance card events appear on the screen, and players can choose the outcome. Depending on the player’s choice, they can experience fame, gains, or losses. Aspiring young actors also get quests that must be fulfilled at home to make more progress in the club.

Although it functions like a career, students do not receive money from doing drama. After proving your worth in the drama club, your Sims will earn the Drama Club Accolade, a decorative trophy that adds posh and beauty to the surroundings.

Have Some Confidence

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The Sims 4’s latest expansion pack, Growing Together, is all about child development, milestones, and family dynamics. Although it focuses more on life stages like infancy and toddlerhood, we also received plenty of new content for children, including the Confidence feature.

Kids can now have high or low confidence based on their actions and how other Sims treat them. Starting with neutral confidence, you can build the meter by doing confidence-boosting activities.

Fulfilling their basic needs, psyching themselves in the mirror, and finishing their homework and projects are some elements that raise children’s confidence levels. 

If Sims maintains high childhood confidence, they will get the High-Self Esteem trait. This trait makes Sims gain the confident moodlet often, even if they experience failure in school or work.

Players who want their Sims to be oozing with confidence must ensure all their basic needs are met. Kids get low confidence from neglecting to fill up their motives. Not completing their aspirations and milestones can also lead to low confidence.

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Low confidence while growing up causes Sims to acquire the troublesome Low Self-Esteem trait. They become tense when they fail to learn a skill. Another thing is that they become anxious if they don’t get career progression for a while. Adult Sims with low confidence can also likely develop a Fear of Failure.

And that is all you need to know about playing your young Sims in The Sims 4! You might also want to check out The Sims 4: Guide to Caring for Toddlers to learn how to manage toddlers in the game.


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